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'What have our kids done for us lately?'

QUESTION: Dotun Adebayo asks 'what have our kids done for us lately?'

PUT YOURSELF in my mate's position. You're a top cop in total submission to the rule of law and order and your beloved daughter brings home an ex-offender as the new man in her life? What would you do?

Do you discard your 30-year allegiance to law and order and do the right thing or do you say, “Nice to meet you, son. Haven't I seen you on Crimewatch?"

Being a father of two young girls – one 14 and the other just turned 12 - I wrestle with myself on a daily basis about every nuance of everything I say to and do with them. On the one hand I want them to be strong to face the life they have to face.

On the other hand the quota of available men who are strong enough to deal with their strength when it comes to wedding time is less than the number of usable fingers on my crippled right hand. But the last thing you want is that your cherished daughter brings home some ‘wotless’ ragamuffin to your door.


So now there is an added complication to the minefield of parental responsibility.

It's not about strong or too strong anymore. It's about making sure that your children live up to your expectations. And I don't know any way to make sure that my daughters live up to my expectations when it comes to their partners in life other than to denigrate any possibility that they would even dream of contemplating dating a waste man.

No matter how slick his walk and talk, my daughters will never see the sweetness in his eyes.

In short, I have ramped up my anti-waste man propaganda machine at home. I'm not going to be like my top cop mate who gave his daughter away at the altar to this ex-criminal. I'm too much of a blackheart man for that.

It is sad that in this day and age it is not up to my daughters who they fall in love with.

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