LET’S BE honest, online dating can be a minefield – but like it or not, it’s become a serious option for the singletons who have exhausted every other avenue to find ‘the one’.
Winsome Duncan is no exception to the dating game and it’s been an eventful decade trying to lure Mr Right into her clutches.
While there have been some close calls, near misses and efforts totally wide of the mark, the south London-based author tells Lifestyle that she ain’t giving up the ghost yet.
Lifestyle: With 10 years of online dating, few people are as experienced as you – was that the motivation for your latest book, He Loves Me Not?
Winsome Duncan: Online dating started in 1994. I was motivated by my tears of frustration and continual disappointment of meeting dates who were somehow broken in their form. I was accused of being a serial dater and I was left depressed and crying for a week and it prompted me to think about why I left this impression. I have always desired a healthy, loving and stable relationship, yet what I was attracting was toxic, harmful and emotionally dwarfed communications with men. I had to lift up the bonnet of my heart and do the internal work and dig deeper. I wanted to discover the reason why, when it hurts so bad, why does it feel so good? Writing this book was cathartic and a journey about self-discovery. It is important for me to highlight safety issues for those who are new to online dating and to provide tools for people who have been unsuccessful in communicating online.
Lifestyle: You detail some sketchy dalliances, even one with a gun, what was that like?
WD: Yes, I was staring down the barrel of a gun – he said…
To read the rest of our interview with Winsome, purchase your copy of The Voice Newspaper here.