Eddie Nestor on struggling becoming a Britain’s Got Talent fan

I HAVE no interest at all Britain’s got talent. Desperate people go on there [often with little or no talent] trying to get themselves on TV at whatever cost. 

The last time I watched it I saw this little girl crying because she didn’t get through and I wondered; ‘Who thinks this is prime time viewing?’. 

There are exceptions I will concede but there are very few hairy angels who emerge to go on and make their millions. But I had the nieces and nephews round and they love the show and so, like any caring, loving parent or guardian, they can watch whatever they like so long as I can have some peace and quiet. 

So we settled down to watch it and I contemplated closing my eyes for a 10-minute power nap. The usual nonsense came on and I was glad that they seemed to enjoy what I thought was nonsense. Then Zipparah Tafari, a man I had worked with in Manchester years before appeared. 

I knew him as Mr. Zip and he specialized in working with children. Gosh I thought; ‘What is he going to do?’. Then he started to sing and I wanted to hide. It was such foolishness, this Where me keys, where me phone? song. 

Then I noticed the children and they were not embarrassed, they were singing, they were dancing. They loved it. Mr. Zip had smashed the proverbial ball out of the park. Where me keys, where me phone? We laughed, we laughed and then we ALL did the dance.

You could see that Simon didn’t know what to make of it at first but it is so catchy and so stupid that you just had to go with it I predict a huge hit and dance to go with it. 

I have no ides what he is going to do now he is thru to the next round but who cares. I was glad to see someone I know doing his thing. I was wrong to diss the show and to be embarrassed by the black guy on the telly.

Next week I will be watching [unbiased] with the kids, hoping that it uncovers another gem and at the end when I have to take them home I hope I will not be saying ‘Where me keys, where me phone?’